I’ve noticed something really interesting over the last several months. It has to do with the energy, time and motivation I have for people who are appreciative. Now, while this may sound like an extremely obvious idea, which perhaps has taken me forty years too long to grasp, I’ve also noticed that many of us have a tendency to place far too much attention on people and activities that just don’t appreciate.
Note the duel meaning here; by appreciation, I’m talking about both an expression of recognition and gratitude, as well as an increase in value. As founder of the Happiness Studies Academy, former Harvard Professor in Positive Psychology and author of the book Happier, Tal Ben Shahar states, “when you appreciate the good, the good appreciates.”
So, what does it mean to “appreciate the good”? Is it as simple as passively taking note of the things that make us grateful, and perhaps even stating them out loud, and writing them down for ourselves? Or, could more be done in the form of appreciation? Is it possible that more of the finer things in life could appreciate, like love, deep friendships, rich conversation, success, wealth and overall life satisfaction, if we took more time to actively express our appreciation of others? Read More
Fake it ‘til you make it: an old adage, which, in my opinion, is incredibly overused and all too often misunderstood.
While the saying is described by Wikipedia as, “an aphorism which suggests that by imitating confidence, competence, and an optimistic mindset, a person can realize those qualities in their real life,” it seems as though the concept fails to fully consider one critical precursor, namely, the very question it begs: How is one supposed to genuinely acquire confidence, competence and an optimistic mindset in the first place?
I’m talking about authentic confidence -- competence and optimism that drives purposeful actions and meaning. This sort of authenticity is not easily replaced with disingenuous behavior. After all, what is so terrible about transparently accepting where we are with full ownership while working toward becoming something better? The more honest we are about ourselves and where we are developmentally, the more we stand to receive opportunities that will help us progress further from where we are.
So, fake it until you make it? Who needs it when we can, instead, work towards a mindset of just "make it, so you never have to fake it?" Here are a few pointers to help us do just that: Read More
I don’t think there’s a person reading this who couldn’t benefit from adding this goal to the very top of her/his 2018 Goals List: GOAL # 1: Double down on gratitude.
Think of how often we tend to set goals on the basis of escaping our current reality. We naturally deduce that “if x happens, then we will surely achieve happiness.” Yet, much like a large bonfire cannot burn without a spark, we cannot achieve happiness without first acknowledging its existence within the present moment.
In other words, energy attracts like energy, so in order to find momentum and motivation to take action towards the things we want, we will want to figure-out how to experience the feelings we want, right now, without allowing another minute to slip away from us. Here’s where gratitude offers the best starting point. Read More
When we attempt to avoid discomfort, we actually make things even more uncomfortable than they have to be. Sometimes all it takes is one uncomfortable conversation to solve a problem, or better yet, implement a brilliant idea. The bottom line is that our ability to get comfortable with discomfort, not only raises our own effectiveness; it also separates true leaders from followers.
True leaders are willing to confront discomfort with ease, while those looking at the back of their heads would prefer to uncomfortably shy away from discomfort. So, what are the signs that you, or someone you know, chronically avoids discomfort and how do others perceive it? Here’s a list of what I like to call, the all too common “discomfort avoiders” Read More
So, how can we make the most optimal use of the varying perspectives that are presented to us at work and within our daily lives? The simple answer is this – let go of your need to be right, which also includes the obsessive habit to constantly seek-out everything that you believe is “wrong.” In my view, the following are the six biggest reasons that right vs. wrong thinking can blind you from opportunity and success. Get ready, I’m about to get all philosophical on you : )… Read More