7 Ways Being Your Own Mom Will Benefit You

In anticipation of Mother’s Day next month, I have a simple question.

What do you think would happen if we treated ourselves like our own moms treat us, or better yet, how might we treat ourselves differently, if it were more like how we treat own children?

If we did, I think we’d probably all live more joyful, stress-free and purposeful lives.

Think about it, the most nurturing mothers not only love and accept their children, no matter what, they also always see their children’s value.

I’ve often laughed at my own mom for openly pointing out my strengths and boasting about my successes, big or small. I’ve shrugged off her words with thoughts like, “of course you’d say that mom – that’s because I’m your daughter.”

But then I remember an important fact.

My mom has been with me from the beginning. Like it or not, she knows me better than most people – the good, the greatest, the bad and the ugly.

Yet, she chooses to always make room for the best version of myself. And, quite frankly, if we could all do the same for ourselves, I think we’d all experience much more inner peace.

So, what can we learn from our moms, and how can we model their behavior to benefit ourselves?

How Does Your World Mirror You?

Most of us enjoy the connection we have to all of the things that are going well in our lives. And, why wouldn’t we? Our own responses and actions to the people, places and things we interact with, each and every day, deserve the utmost credit when it comes to our wins.

In the same vein, we are also deeply connected to all of things we don’t like. Yet, many of us would prefer to escape these sorts of accreditations, and replace them with blame. Blame of the people, places and things that cause us to react in the very ways we don’t like. In doing so, we simply remove our most powerful mirrors, which when noticed, reflect some of life’s most profound personal lessons.

To notice our reflections in all situations, whether we label them as ‘likes’ or ‘dislikes,’ we need to move past our own victimization and finger pointing in order to see the lessons. The lessons guide us with the most accurate compass for action. They teach us more about ourselves, as well as how we can personally impact change, by assuming accountability for what’s happening in our own worlds.

When we become personally responsible for what happens to us, we empower ourselves to make a unique impact within our own lives, and also with the world at large. So, where do we find ourselves in life’s mirrors, and how can we learn from their most valuable reflections?

Dear Company: Here’s Why I’m Burned-out & This Is What You Can Do About It

As a career and executive coach, I’ve spent hundreds of hours working with many clients who have dealt with, or are on the verge of burnout. I’ve also dealt with burnout myself, and I can speak firsthand about how draining, disappointing and frustrating it is.

It’s frustrating because more often than not, burned-out employees are enthusiastic about contributing their talents and value, and yet, they become completely drained and disappointed, when they realize that the work environment they support is not nearly as dedicated to them, as they are to it.

Burnout is typically addressed with a focus on what individuals can do to avoid it themselves. And, while these types of approaches are helpful, there’s still more to the burnout equation. So, let’s face the elephant in the room. A person’s ability to create healthy work habits, involves her/his company’s support.

This begs an important question – how can employers take more responsibility for providing healthy work environments? To assist with some answers, I’ve written a letter. It’s addressed to companies who could benefit from learning why their most valued employees may be on the verge of burnout.

If you think your company is ready to have an honest dialogue about what it will really take to minimize burnout and turnover, then feel free to adjust this for your own use. I double-dog dare you.

Nina CashmanJanuary 12, 2017#burnout, #paveyourway, #ExecutiveCoaching, #CareerTips, #careercoaching Comments

5 Ways We Avoid Discomfort & How It Restricts Us To Lead

When we attempt to avoid discomfort, we actually make things even more uncomfortable than they have to be. Sometimes all it takes is one uncomfortable conversation to solve a problem, or better yet, implement a brilliant idea. The bottom line is that our ability to get comfortable with discomfort, not only raises our own effectiveness; it also separates true leaders from followers.

True leaders are willing to confront discomfort with ease, while those looking at the back of their heads would prefer to uncomfortably shy away from discomfort. So, what are the signs that you, or someone you know, chronically avoids discomfort and how do others perceive it? Here’s a list of what I like to call, the all too common “discomfort avoiders”

7 Reasons To Stop Cursing Work

Why is it that so many people in today’s world view hard work as the antitheses to success? In the eyes of many, it seems like unless you are off sailing the world, lying on a beach, playing tons of golf, and living a life of leisure, you might actually be failing. So, what’s the result of this type of thinking? And, better yet, how successful is it in, well, actually achieving success?

I often come across people on an ongoing quest to accumulate wealth, while limiting their involvement with actual work. Their ultimate goal is to live life to the fullest by avoiding too much responsibility that comes with the word. So, what happens next? Well, quite often, these same people end up calling a career and executive coach, like me, feeling “stuck.”

Learn Why Connecting With Problems Heightens Your Creativity

A common theme amongst many ancient philosophers and spiritual leaders is the concept of connectivity as a pathway to creativity. In other words, when we feel deeply connected to something, then we allow it to inspire and empower us at the same time. Yet, when we separate ourselves from these same things, we instead, exacerbate our own feelings of isolation and dis-empowerment – a tough space for anyone to experience much of any creativity.

Now, just think of how differently we might show-up in both our personal and professional lives, if we made an effort to actually view our problems as a part of ourselves, instead of trying to separate ourselves from them? Better yet, how might the world start to look if we fearlessly chose to step inside of our problems?

Discover How To Own Your Mood And Claim Your Day

Picture it. You’ve been prepping for a third interview for quite sometime, and you are really excited to shed your knowledge and discuss future possibilities with an exciting company that really interests you.

In fact, the rest of your week revolves around the outcome of this meeting – you’ve placed a myriad of tasks on-hold, and you’ve even waited to schedule some personal appointments before gaining a better understanding for what’s next with this potential employer. Then, last minute, your interview is unexpectedly canceled. There you are left with a new void on your calendar and a preoccupied mind that was planning on a much different outcome for the day.

So, now what? It makes perfect sense that many of us might feel a little disappointed and even impatient with this type of situation. This could cause things to go one of two ways: either the rest of the day will unravel from a state of powerlessness, or we will empower ourselves to seize the day, no matter what.

How To Make Effort Feel Effortless

An amazing thing happens when we notice that we are working hard, yet we still feel excited, motivated, and in a complete flow with our actions. In those moments, our biggest causes transcend our efforts and feel effortless. There’s a great saying, “If you want to be happy, put your effort into controlling the sail, not the wind.” In other words, when we channel our efforts toward the things that we can personally control — namely ourselves — then we flow with less resistance and a heck of a lot less conflict. This requires accepting whatever we are experiencing. So, how can we ride that wave of effortlessness more often?

Are You Judging or Just Being Plain Judgmental?

So, the question isn’t really whether or not we all judge; but rather, how are we doing it? Are we doing it in ways that inspire positive action from ourselves and the world around us, or are we simply making critical judgments about life, ourselves, the world, and the people in it that actually limit us in some way? Are we discerning for ourselves, or just plain being judgmental? Let’s take a look at two common judgments that go beyond self-discernment, and transcend into limiting beliefs that actually block our potential.

Are You Busy or Just Blocked?

Most of us have heard ourselves say it before: “I’m so busy right now that I can’t even see straight.” Without question, there are times in life that are more packed with “to-dos” than others. At the same time, many of us have allowed the concept of busy to surpass being an occasional experience. Now, it’s a key part of our personal identities.

Just think about the phrase “I am busy,” which goes far beyond a mere observation about what a person is experiencing, and becomes a personal declaration of one’s state of being. When put into these terms, we might feel more compelled to ask ourselves, “Is busy the extent of who I really am?” Surely, we can all come up with something a little more creative, not to mention more accurate, for ourselves than that.

Nina CashmanApril 13, 2016#careercoaching, #toobusy, #stressed, #overworked, #worklifebalance, #workaholic, #makingtimeComment

7 Energy Levels Influencing Money In Your Life

Recently, I was interviewed by Hilary Hendershott on Profit Boss Radio about how our attitudes inevitably shape the way we experience money. Our money beliefs form early in our lives, and they typically are tied to our upbringings. Once you understand what’s behind these beliefs, you can challenge those that are holding you back.

At every energy level, there are unique core thoughts, feelings, and actions that affect our experiences. Let’s look at the seven different forms of energy that filter our perspectives on money. Which energy level filters your money views?

Expect More of What You Don't Want

Often, we find ourselves hyper-focused on all the things we don’t want — “I don’t want to fail,” “I don’t want this to go badly,” or “I don’t want to make a fool of myself.” Yet, doing this unwittingly steers us down the very paths we’d prefer to avoid. Why?

Because we aren’t widening our perspectives to see new possibilities of what we actually do want. The difference is this: “Don’t wants” focus our energy on driving us away from the things we don’t like, while “do wants” actually steer us toward the things that excite and motivate us.

Nina CashmanFebruary 18, 2016#TowardGoals, #WhatDoYouWant, #goalsettingComment